In my flu-induced-delusion I decided to watch 'Hitch.' The premise (for those who haven't seen this piece of cinematic genius)goes something likes this:
Dating Dr (Will Smith) takes conventionally-physically-unattractive, shy, awkward guys (who are of course sweet and caring on the inside) and one way or another ensures that the conventionally-physically-attractive woman of their choice learns to look beyond the superficiality of appearance and fall in love with them.
The rest of the plot is highly predictable and of no importance here.
There is of course nothing wrong with the feel-good message of looking beyond appearance and loving people for who they are, not what they look like. However it struck me, lying awake in a flu-induced bout of insomnia, that in movies, stories, fairy tales, (society?), it is consistently the female characters who must overcome what is often physical revulsion in order to learn to love the man for 'himself', thus revealing his true inner beauty.
Beauty and the Beast and the story of the Frog Prince are classic examples.
And there aren't many stories of attractive men learning to love physically "unattractive" women for their personalities.
Men are allowed to be fat and still found attractive - eg. Charlotte's 2nd hubby in Sex and the City, Albert in 'Hitch'.
Women are allowed to be beautiful but poor and dirty (Cinderella) - nothing a hot bath won't fix - but men, we are told, are not able to fall in love with "unattractive", let alone fat, women unless the woman has undergone a major physical transformation, rendering her beautiful.
I'd be really interested to hear what other examples you can think of relating to this theme - either supporting or contradicting.
It seems to me that yet again women are being taught they must strive constantly for physical 'perfection' (whatever that means) in order to find a 'good' guy, which they will only do when they stop making judgments based on physical appearance. Meanwhile men are told they can look anyway they like, be a good guy, and still get the hot girl.
Maybe men are just more literal: they don't see the beauty until they see the beauty.
If anyone's seen that Jack Black/Gwen Paltrow/fat-suit movie I'd love you to tell me how it relates to this so I don't have to watch it.
Hello!!
5 years ago
Right. Here we go:
ReplyDeleteShrek. Princess Fiona is a beautiful lady who has the option of marrying a handsome rich prince, but instead gets lumped with an ogre. The ogre is overweight and hairy yet she falls in love with him for his personality because she is not superficial. He falls for her because she is beautiful. Lo and behold she turns out to be an ogre too, but luckily he has already fallen in love with her so is not turned off.
Shallow Hal. Jack Black is bewitched into thinking that Gwyneth Paltrow is thin and therefore conventionally beautiful when actuallys she is obese. Luckily by the time she reveals her true self he has already fallen in love with her. But he would not have looked twice had she not appeared thin.
In short, women who are not supermodels must disguise themselves in order to attract a man's attention, and when that is done, and a marriage proposal received, they can reveal themselves and hope for the best.
Sam did you want examples from real fairytales, or is Hollywood cinema suitable for this exercise?
:)
Thanks Claire!
ReplyDeleteOf course Hollywood cinema is suitable. I think it's also very useful to be reminded that the morals of the fairy tales that shaped our childhood are largely the same as those rehashed by Hollywood year after year.
Oh, and thanks for the Shallow Hal synopsis.
ReplyDeleteRefreshingly one story that contradicts these trends is Bridget Jones. Bridget (and her mother) seem to be the only ones who doubt Bridget is lovable 'just the way she is.' The charm of the story lies in Bridget's discovery that she is indeed loved, without the need for any dramatic makeover of her personality or physical appearance.
The amount of attention Renee Zellweger attracted by gaining weight to play the role speaks volumes about expectations of what equals a physically attractive woman.
Of course, the fact that it takes getting a fella for Bridg to find some sense of contentment with herself is another issue entirely...
I agree on all points. I can't remember what episode it is, but I really like it when Bridget dumps all of her self-help books in the bin. I think at that point she realises there is nothing wrong with her - it is everybody else!
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